1999 Early Spring

Leslie blushed when the waitress saw his pictures

I went back to Tokyo in the middle of December. We were rushing the production of the book. The film shoot of the new movie in which Leslie and Anita would act together, was supposed to start in early May. The film shoot would be held in Europe so we had no choice but to hold the autograph-event within the month of April. We knew that the schedule of the film shoot in Hong Kong tended never to go well according to plan, but still we should not make our plan based on the assumption that the film shoot would be delayed. We worked very hard and managed to enter the stage of the layout of the book. We planned to go to Hong Kong to show the layout of the book to Leslie. As Leslie did not understand Japanese, there would be a big problem on his part to check on the content of the manuscript so we had the manuscript translated into Mandarin by the translation company. I would not know the degree of the accuracy of the translation since I don’t understand Mandarin at all. Anyway we had no choice but to show the translated manuscript to Leslie.

In the early February of 1999, I visited Hong Kong again. This time we stayed at the Hotel Hong Kong, which is one of the older and more established hotels in Kowloon. On arriving in Hong Kong by the night flight, I called Leslie, and he asked me where I was staying. I told him the name of the hotel and he said he would come to see me at the hotel coffee shop the next day at 3 o’clock in the afternoon.

Next afternoon at 3:00 p.m. Leslie showed up with a cellular phone in one hand and a car key in the other hand. He looked very casual, wearing an off-white T shirt and worn-out blue jeans. In addition, a bunch of his hair was tousled on the top of his head, maybe because he had not smoothed out his hair!

When he found me, he came toward me with his big smile and open arms, just the same as our previous meeting 2 months ago. It was only 2 months since we parted, but I had missed him very much and I was moved to tears to see him. “How have you been? Long time no see!!” We exchanged small talk and sat down on the sofa. Then we chatted with each other on how we had been getting along for these past 2 months. I had been busy making this book and Leslie had been busy making 2 movies, “The Kid” and “Moonlight Express.” We didn’t have much news except our business so our conversation about each other soon came to the end. After our quick exchange of our recent happenings, Leslie gave a quick look around the lobby and the coffee shop. He said, “It has been quite a long time since I came here. I think the atmosphere of this coffee shop has changed. There was not such a big table here before. Recently there have been many big hotels that are newly built. I seldom use the old hotels, but actually, I love these kinds of old historic hotels. This is an old style building, so the ceiling is high and the room is spacious, moreover the rates are quite reasonable too. I would rather recommend this hotel!” Leslie was full of praises for this hotel.

Each time I met Leslie, I was impressed with his knowledge of hotels. He was familiar with the details of the hotels in Hong Kong. He would never pick a particular hotel all the time but always chose different hotels. In comparison with the Conrad or Grand Hyatt, Hotel Hong Kong is not of the highest grade, but Leslie, who was dressed very casually, blended well into the atmosphere. The coffee shop was entirely visible from the lobby. It had a disorderly and avant-garde feeling.
Saying “It is too soon, but...” I showed Leslie the draft copy of the cover page. Leslie looked around as if he was worried about being seen and then he looked at it.

Leslie with the red shirt on the cover of the photo-book came with a little episode behind it. We took those photos in the dining room in Leslie house. We decided to use the clothes by Hermes and Jil Sander, but all of them which Leslie had chosen were of very chic and quiet color tone. These clothes were all stylish and of good choice but I prefer a bit more vivid tone. Luckily we were taking photos in his house, so I asked him if he had any other richer color clothes. Leslie answered, “Yes. I have red or blue…” Then he went to his closet in his bed room and fetched a red shirt and a blue shirt as he said. Correctly speaking they were dark red and cobalt blue. The dark red shirt made his face look bright and vivid, so I chose it but it was also true that Leslie looked a bit childish in the red shirt. Now I am thinking perhaps the blue one might be better because it could have make Leslie look sharper…

Just as I expected, Leslie took a look at the pictures and muttered, “I look a bit childish, don’t I?” I answered, “Maybe so, but I like your image in this picture. I think it is good for the front cover!”

Leslie gazed at the picture once more for a while and agreed, “Yes, I guess so.”

At that moment two of the waitresses were standing behind Leslie; they glanced at the picture and exclaimed, “Oh, how nice!!” Then Leslie felt abashed and quickly turned the picture over. I noticed that he was blushing! I could not believe what I saw; Leslie, who had been a star for more than 20 years, blushed when his picture was seen by others! Since then I cannot forget the scene; “Leslie blushed when his picture was seen by waitresses.” This episode always reminds me of the real Leslie, who was actually rather shy.

“Well ,” he handed the cover copy faced down to me and then he whispered saying, “People are looking at me here so I will have a look at the layout of these photos at home tomorrow night. I have asked a professional cook to come and prepare dinner tomorrow night. I have also invited some of my friends over. Let’s show the pictures to them! I am looking forward to seeing the pictures then!” Then he bent over and began to read the translated Mandarin manuscript quickly. As for the interview part, he skimmed through it without any comments, since the content was based on his own oral account but the part on “Speaking about real Leslie” was all new to him, so he was reading with a rather earnest look, murmuring, “Ummm…” or “Oh...” I asked him, “Do you care about what your friends said about you?” Leslie replied, “Well…yes, a little bit.” And he smiled at me.

The process of the record-breaking autograph event

While I was staying in Hong Kong, I had to do 2 important things. One of them was to have the rough of the book checked by Leslie. And the other was the business talk about the autograph event with Leslie. I had been worried about it since the end of the previous year.

I had received numerous letters and e-mail since the publication of the photo book and the announcement of the plan for the autograph event. The telephone in the editorial department rang hot. It was a very difficult situation for us to handle! The wild confusion had already started even before we prepared for the event.

Actually the announcement of the publication of the book was supposed to be much later as Leslie himself requested this of me. He said he didn’t want the Hong Kong media to start the rumor before the details have been decided yet. I also knew it well that the Hong Kong mass media would search for even a small piece of news with sharp eyes. So we had been very careful not to leak out our plan but the information leaked out unexpectedly. To my surprise, it was Leslie himself who revealed the event to the reporters of Hong Kong newspapers!! Moreover he kindly disclosed the name of our company. The news spread around quickly and a lot of inquiries started coming into our office. I didn’t know the intention of Leslie; in spite of what he said about not leaking out the news, Leslie himself announced it without any hesitations! Why??? So, honestly speaking, I didn’t know how to deal with this happening.

Though I could not understand his real motive, our publication of the book was true and it would be open to the public sooner or later so we changed our plan and decided to make a public announcement of the photo-book.

The hectic days had started since then…

As for the inquiries to the editorial department, though there were those who expressed their gratitude, however most of them expressed their dissatisfactions, such as, “I am happy to hear about the autography event, but why only 300 people? It won’t be acceptable!” Some of them went as far to warn us, “How are you going to choose only 300 people? You may not know how frantic Leslie fans are! If you do it in a wrong way, a riot could break out! Be careful!” There were some extreme comments such as, “Are you kidding Leslie fans?” Or “I cannot forgive you if you choose 300 people irresponsibly!!”

At first we were shocked at the enthusiastic response from Leslie fans. We felt scary but gradually we began to understand that all of them were just eager to see Leslie from the bottom of their heart. If I were a fan, I would feel it unacceptable that only 300 people could be chosen. Yet we had to place a certain limitation to the people in attendance. If 300 people were too few in number, then we should first consult Leslie on how many signatures he could sign.

When I told him about my anxiety regarding the autograph event at the hotel coffee shop, Leslie immediately started to sign his signature on a piece of paper on the table. After writing several signatures, he said, “I can handle 1000 people” “What? A thousand people?” I repeated his words. Then he signed more signatures in the air again and said, “Yes, I think I can!” As I had never done an autograph event, I had no idea how tedious it was to write 1000 signatures. Only Leslie knew it and he himself assured me he could handle it. So I took his words for it and decided to hold a “1000 people autograph event”.

By the way, to tell you the truth, I was worried about something completely different at that time. I was worried whether 1000 people would actually show up at the event. Leslie seemed to share the same thought too though it didn’t come up in our conversation. Leslie had not realized yet the extent of his popularity in Japan accurately. You can see it by the following episode. I think the conversation was held during our meeting at the coffee shop.

I: “I will arrange a pick-up limousine for you at the airport.”

Leslie: “The pick-up limousine is quite expensive, isn’t it? I won’t need it!”

I: “Then how will you get to Tokyo?”

Leslie: “I would rather take an airport limousine bus.”

I: “Airport limousine bus? I have never used it.”

Leslie: “Really? The bus arrives at Hokozaki station in Tokyo. It is very convenient. Nobody has ever noticed me before, so it will be also OK this time. I will take a taxi from there to the hotel. So please wait at the hotel.”

Leslie seemed to have been to Japan many times privately and had taken the airport bus before but this time, it was completely different. The date of the event would be announced beforehand all over Japan so therefore it would be very easy for fans to guess Leslie would arrive in Japan on the day prior to the event. Even if they would not know the time of his arrival, some of them could be waiting for Leslie at the airport the whole day. What would happen if they were to find out that Leslie is taking the airport bus? In spite of Leslie’s optimistic thinking, I could see Leslie would be surrounded by some fanatic fans at Narita airport.

My perspective was also too optimistic then, but I only thought the airport limousine bus was a bit risky and the pick-up limousine would be better.

In those days, we had decided many things openly without much consideration and defense. As for the hotel accommodation, I decided against the Park Hyatt, where Leslie always used when he was visiting Japan. I decided that a totally different hotel where Leslie had never stayed before would be better. The Park Hyatt became too popular for Leslie fans and I heard some devoted fans had already made reservations at the Park Hyatt expecting Leslie to stay there in April. Leslie said, “I prefer the Park Hyatt, but it will be fine with me to stay in a different hotel if you feel uneasy. But I would like the hotel with a gym”.

I knew why Leslie loved the Park Hyatt very much. The bed, the linen, the color tone of the wall and carpet of the room as well as the built of the bathroom and amenity goods, all of these were amazingly similar to those of Leslie’s bedroom. I thought Leslie felt totally relaxed in the room as if he were in his own room. However for me, his security should come first before all others so I made a plan to choose an unknown hotel on the pretext he was staying at the Park Hyatt. For this reason I chose the Four Season hotel in Bunkyo district. There is no public transportation facility to the area except by cars. Moreover it is a small hotel which has a privacy oriented policy and the Victorian style. The atmosphere of the hotel is very chic and gorgeous. It is totally different from the modern and sophisticated atmosphere of the Park Hyatt. The point was nobody would imagine that Leslie would want to stay in such a hotel. Later, when Leslie arrived at the hotel, he said exactly what I had expected. I remember I felt funny and happy at the same time listening to his comment.

The party in Leslie’s house and the encounter with Mr. Tong

On the second night in Hong Kong, we visited Leslie’s house after a long interval. As soon as I rang the doorbell, Leslie showed up at the front door. He seemed to be in quite good humor because of the effects of some alcohol. Leslie was wearing a shiny blue shirt and a pair of slim pants made of soft material. He looked so handsome that I felt as if his existence was out of this world (as if belonged to another world). I was charmed by his good looks and thought to myself, “How wonderful this man is!” The party had already started and there were several guests. The guests who were invited to this party were all those who were involved in the photo book; Leslie’s friends, my friends, and our friends’ friends. I had met all of them at the interview last year, so without any social greetings we decided to see the draft layout of the book before dinner.

We put the 200-paged draft layout on the floor of the living room. Leslie looked at the pictures carefully starting from the first page and the rest of us were following after Leslie. Leslie reacted differently depending on the pictures; at times he was a bit embarrassed, shaking his head or frowning. Then finally he gave his approval to all of them except 2 photos, both of which Leslie would not use at all. These were the close-up pictures taken at the library in the China Club. Leslie insisted on not using them. He said, “They are so similar to the pictures in the photo book published 10 years ago.” I must admit that the Leslie in the pictures looked too young and immature, but still I could not help smiling when I heard his comment. He said, “It looks as if I had not grown up at all in these 10 years!! Don’t you think so?”

When we finished checking all the photos, another guest joined us. This person was tall and slender, had an elegant feature with a shapely nose and had a quiet atmosphere. I realized who he was at first glance. Leslie was standing between the man and me. He said, “You have never met him before, right? I would like to introduce you to him. This is Mr. Tong.” Leslie had told me about him many times during the previous interview, but this was my first meeting with Mr. Tong. I had not expected to see him here, so it was a bit unsettling for me as I wondered how to associate with this person but my fear was totally groundless.

Mr. Tong is a very natural person; serene and placid and is unperturbed with others or make others feel uneasy. Those who were with him somehow could feel his warmth. Leslie must have wished that Mr. Tong would not be a target of the mass media after his death but the fact remained that it was not only the mass media in Hong Kong but also in Japan had made up inconsiderate rumors. So I should avoid the episodes about Mr. Tong himself as much as possible but I really want to clarify this fact. I have met Mr. Tong many times since this first encounter; sometimes with Leslie and sometimes without Leslie. And every time I met him, he was always calm and kept his own pace as if he lived in a totally different world. He is completely different in temperament from Leslie, who had a very hot temper. I could see Mr. Tong’s calm and tender words always soothed Leslie’s emotions which tended to heat up too much. While I was working with Leslie, I had witnessed many such occasions. I am not sure how it had been before, but as far as these few years were concerned, I feel the existence of Mr. Tong and his influence upon Leslie should not be overlooked when I am writing something about Leslie. If we really want to understand what Leslie was thinking at that time or to understand the real Leslie, I think it is necessary to write something about what Mr. Tong said or did. So I would like to write a bit about him as long as it is not an invasion to his privacy. I believe it is also good for Leslie, as he might be looking down with anxiety from somewhere in the sky to see how Mr. Tong is doing after his departure…

Well let’s get back to the story. When we finished checking the draft of the book, we were invited to the dining table. A female chef, who was a long-time friend of Leslie, was introduced to us. She was a chef of a very famous restaurant in Hong Kong and all the delicacies for the dinner were her original creations. She said these dishes were especially created for Leslie’s party only.
Regrettably I don’t remember the splendid dishes well now, but from my faded memories, her signature dishes were a fusion of Western and Chinese cuisines. I remember all of them were unique and very tasty. They were so nice that we enjoyed our meal in silence with hardly any conversation for a while.

Man Chai was still working for Leslie and he was helping out with the party. He sometimes came out of the kitchen and got some food on his small plate from Leslie and crammed them into his mouth while walking here and there. Though he was a big boy, he looked childish as usual and I felt as if a neighbor’s kid were just visiting the party. I asked Leslie, “Can Man Chai be a good assistant?” Leslie replied rather seriously, “Well he won’t be. He may not be working with me when you come next time.” When I was leaving for Japan last December, I asked Man Chai what kinds of souvenir he wanted. He answered immediately, “Japanese sweets!!”, so I bought a small box of Japanese sweets for him. When I handed it to him, Man Chai jumped for joy and expressed with body language that he wanted to take it back home and share them with his parents and brothers. When the party started, he helped the maids, he ate and drank but he seemed to have left for home before I even noticed. I have never seen Man Chai since then.
After dinner Leslie brought out some bottles of his treasured red wine from his wine cellar and poured some into our glasses. In Leslie’s living room, there were a big set of black sofa and a white sofa bed for his nap and by the pillar was a small antique chair. The shape of the small chair was a bit distorted and it looked unstable, but Leslie seemed to love the chair. With wine glass in hand he sat himself down on the small chair. He looked so cute in that antique chair that I wanted to make a miniature of them to take back home with me!! Though he looked very cute, our conversation however was a quite serious one.

At first this photo book was supposed to be published in Japan only. There were two major reasons for this. One of the reasons was there aren’t many book stores in Hong Kong and usually book stores only sell novels and reference books for study whilst photo books and magazines are sold only by the street venders. When we discussed about the publisher at the last meeting, Leslie’s directive was not to sell this book at the street venders as he didn’t want to turn it into a cheap book. He was not willing to sell the books in Hong Kong and China if the books were sold in the open air market. Reason number two was the likelihood of a pirated edition. Leslie was extremely afraid of the emergence of a pirated edition so therefore he was very much against having his book printed by the publishing companies in Hong Kong. This was simply unacceptable. Because of our tight schedule, I told him I would like to use the subsidiary company of a Japanese printer in Hong Kong, which had the same printing technique as Japan, Leslie shook his head firmly as if he wanted to say, “No way!!” Then he said, “You don’t understand it! The workers are not Japanese. If there is just one person who could be easily bribed, a lot of pirated editions will be sold at the street stalls all over Asia before the real book is published!” I told him laughingly, “You don’t trust them at all!!” Then he said with a serious look, “We have been violated for a long time. If you work in Hong Kong long enough, you will learn not to trust them at all! Japanese common sense does not work here in Hong Kong. It will be too late when it happens. Anyway, you had better follow my advice and do the whole process in Japan.”
However on this day, Leslie sitting on the antique chair said with a cute smile, “I had second thoughts after the previous meeting. People in Hong Kong may feel hurt if my photo book is published only in Japan. They may say, “Are you a Hong Konger? Why only in Japan?” So I think it is better for us to sell the book here in Hong Kong as well.” It was a matter of course, so I agreed with him saying, “Yes, I think so too.” Selling the book in Hong Kong was not a problem at all. The problem was finding the proper place to sell the book. I asked Leslie about it and he said he would not want to sell the book at the street stalls as I expected. He said he wanted to sell the book only at the art book stores which sell foreign books. Such stores are very rare in Hong Kong. We would be able to find only a few shops even if we were looking for them all around Hong Kong. I said to Leslie, “If we sell the book only at such stores, we can sell only a small number of books and above all, the class of the customers are different, don’t you think so?” Then Leslie said, “I know that. We need not sell so many copies at the stores. This photo book will be too expensive for the average Hong Kong people. So we choose one book store and ask them to sell only 300 copies. I will autograph all of them. That will be OK.”

In those days, Leslie was accused by the Hong Kong mass-media one after another that he was focusing too much on the Japanese market. So I think this was Leslie’s solution to refute those claims. He could say with his head held high, “I publish my book and do the autograph event not only in Japan but also in Hong Kong.”

By the way, during our conversation, Leslie suggested that we should sell the posters and commemorative goods as well. Though we sold his posters, the idea of selling commemorative souvenir goods did not materialize. To tell you the truth, Leslie was very interested in designing interiors and small articles (goods). He told me he had wanted to be a designer if he didn’t become an actor. Actually he was eager to make those goods and design some souvenir items like mugs, cups and spoons with his signature in English. Unfortunately we could not make it by the time of the autograph event because of the tight schedule and the plan failed to materialize.
After the autograph event, the making of his goods still came up in our conversation once in a while. At that time Leslie was running a coffee shop with the owner of “Queen’s Café” (the shop was closed down afterwards). He said he had a dream to open an interior décor and bedding shop in Japan in the future. He also said that once he started drawing rough sketches on his design notebook and he enjoyed it so much that he forgot the passage of time.

He asked me a lot about Japanese celebrity stores. He also asked me where in my opinion would be the best place for him if he wanted to open such a shop in Tokyo. Unfortunately I did not have any useful information about that and could not give him any good advice. But in my eyes, he really had talent and a flair for designing. If his dream to have a shop in Japan had come true at that time, perhaps his talent in the designing world could have blossomed and it might have been what he could live for even if he could not satisfy his dream in the movie world in Hong Kong. When I think about that, I feel deeply sad and regretful…..

He really got drunk when he played a part of a drunkard!

He really got drunk when he played a part of a drunkard!

The film shooting after Leslie had shaved his beard commenced at the Discovery Bay. Though we had a bitter experience at the MacDonald’s restaurant, we also had a lot of heart-warming episodes during the tracking report and all of them were so endearing and amusing that I still cannot help smiling when I remember them.

We enjoyed the picnic mood on board the ferry, but on arriving at the Bay, we shivered from the cold. After having a bite to eat at the MacDonald’s, we headed to the yacht marina where the movie was supposed to be filmed. It was getting darker and colder on the road along the sea.
When we went into the lobby of the marina, Leslie came close to me and whispered into my ear, “You had better go to the washroom. It is cold here and there will be no toilet from here.”

I think I should especially mention such kind of caring and tender consideration of Leslie. I used to smoke in those days. Leslie said that it was 3 years since he had given up smoking though he used to be a heavy smoker. When he saw me puffing away, he would say, “You had better give up smoking. If you quit smoking, you will be healthier and your skin will be smoother. My health condition has been very well since I stopped smoking!” On the other hand, whenever I was looking around restlessly with nothing to do, he would bring an ashtray from somewhere, put it in front of me and say, “How about a smoke?” I got the same words from him at the lobby of the marina. Returning from the washroom, I was shivering because of the coldness when Leslie brought an ashtray from the reception desk and put it in front of me saying, “Here you are!” I said, “Oh, thank you, but no thanks right now.” Then Leslie advised me “You had better smoke. Though I recommend you to stop smoking but having a cigarette will make you feel relax when your body is stiff because of the coldness and tension.” Following the advice of the ex-heavy smoker, I had a smoke. Leslie was looking at me a bit enviously while I was smoking.

As for the cigarette, there was a dramatic episode afterward, but it came after three years from this tracking report.

The film shooting at the yacht marina was held in a deluxe yacht borrowed from a rich English man. It was the scene in which the hero, who was an elite stock dealer, had lost all his money because of a plunge in the stock market and out of desperation he took to the bottle in his yacht. To my surprise, Leslie acted his role by gulping down real wine and whisky. He had to act out this scene several times until the director said OK, and each time he drank every drop up. I could see he was totally drunk in the later part of the scene. Though he had bloodshot eyes and he seemed too drunk to speak his lines clearly, he still acted his part perfectly. When the director finally said OK, a loud round of applause arose from all the crew. I was amazed and said to myself, “I thought he was totally drunk, but it was just his acting! How wonderful!” Then Leslie suddenly came close to me with his arms outstretched and his face with an awful look was just in front of my face! I was too surprised to cry and just ran away. Leslie started laughing loudly. He then took off his shirt while drinking wine directly from the bottle and began to dance. He was half-naked and singing “Ta la la…..” He was really tipsy just as I had thought!

After the shooting, Leslie and I walked slowly to the ferry port for about 20 minutes so that Leslie could sober up. While walking, Leslie still intoxicated from the wine, was chatting on with a lisp on a variety of things such as the down jacket that he bought and how he found his pair of very comfortable sneakers. The sneakers were a new design by New Balance and I was delighted to response that I had also bought the same type of sneakers. He also talked about an episode that happened while shooting the soccer scene in the movie, “Viva Erotica” (though I remembered we were talking about it, I regrettably forgot the content), and also about liquor, cooking, and so on. If I remember correctly, we also talked about Japanese actresses. I have forgotten what had led us onto the topic, but we were discussing something about the movie, “Moonlight Express”, in which he collaborated with Japanese actress, Takako Tokiwa. Our conversation then progressed to the topic of who would be a good actress if he were to team up with a Japanese actress the next time. He asked me, “Are there any actresses you would recommend me to team up with?” So I recalled the faces of the actresses who were playing in the movies or TV dramas in Japan at that time. Then I pointed out some of them who I thought were compatible with Leslie. Leslie knew about half of them. He said, “Oh, she was playing in that drama.” “Yes, I know her face. She is pretty.” The rest of them whom he didn’t know, he asked me curiously, “Oh, I didn’t know her. What kind of a person is she? Will you send me her pictures next time?”

Among the Hong Kong actresses, Leslie’s most favorite actress in those days was Karen Mok. From his words, Karen is extremely intelligent and she has a charming character. Later on with Leslie’s firsthand recommendation I had interviewed her for a chapter of the book, “Talking about true Leslie”. She was indeed a very gentle and honest girl and so I became her fan after I finished the interview.

There was another episode about Karen. In a press interview, Leslie was asked, “Who do you have in mind as the leading lady in your movie?”, and Leslie answered “Karen!” Then the reporter said, “She is not a beautiful girl, perhaps she is not suitable to be the heroin of a love story, is she?” Leslie replied, “Facial features are not so important. I can make her beautiful!”
Then the Hong Kong media reported what he said in a teasing way but I really understood what he really wanted to say. When I interviewed her, she didn’t wear any make-up. She might not be the typical beauty that Hong Kong media would praised, but her face is very radiant and I believed she would be very attractive with make up. With her slender style as well as her charming character, I thought she was very attractive.

As I mentioned before, Karen’s apartment was near Leslie’s house. The next day of the interview with Karen, I went to Leslie’s house. When I arrived at his house, Leslie came out of the front door asking, “Did you see Karen over there?” When I answered no, he said, “She had been to my house and went back home just now. She brought over a homemade cake. She said it was also for you!” He pointed at the big cake box on the table. It was a green tea cake, which was rare in Hong Kong. As is often the case with homemade cakes, it looked very plain and simple but it was very tasty. I asked Leslie, “Did she really make this cake by herself?” Leslie answered, “Well, I don’t know. Maybe her mother helped her.” I think the cake was a token of her gratitude to Leslie because he recommended her to me for the interview.

I thought it was very nice of her to bring a homemade cake instead of buying something expensive.

The movie in which Leslie was supposed to be a director and Karen as a heroin did not materialize forever. To tell you the truth, half a year after this interview, Leslie asked my advice on the movie. I am going to write about it in a later chapter.

I was in a cold sweat from the shortening of the length of his pants and the mystery about cognac.

The last photo shoot of this book was held in the lounge of the China Club. We had reserved the whole club for half a day. It is a members' club for the upper class in Hong Kong, and was used in a scene in the movie, “He's A Woman, She's A Man”. You might think it must be expensive to reserve it, but to tell you the truth, they offered it for nothing because Leslie was a member.

Many funny things happened in this club. I can say it was funny now, but at that time those events upset me very much.

The clothes Leslie wore on that day were by Hermes and Jil Sander. Leslie himself went to the shops and chose them a few days before.

We had already negotiated with the shop. We didn’t know exactly when Leslie would come, so I asked him to go to the shop and choose the clothes when he had some free time. According to the clerk in the shop (to the best of my memory, it was a Jil Sander shop), Leslie showed up unexpectedly. As soon as he entered the shop, he looked over all the clothes and pointed randomly at some of them, saying, “I am not sure I will wear it or not, but this one, that one, and, well, this one, too…” Then he left the shop quickly, saying, “Well, I will leave them to you!” It took only a few minutes for Leslie to do that. One of the clerks said, “We were looking forward to getting his autograph and had prepared a special card for it but he came to and left the shop like a wind. So I had no chance to ask him for his signature!” So we were handed a piece of paper and asked to get his autograph when we brought back the clothes.

The way Leslie had chosen his clothing, it ended up that the suits were not quite fitting for his size. One of them was the gray suit which was Leslie’s favorite. He insisted on wearing it although the jacket was too long and the pants were too big. We managed to fix the jacket by using clips which we tried to hide from the camera but it was very difficult to fix the length of the pants. Though we tried to take good pictures, it was obvious that the pants were too big. So the pictures which had his lower half of the body were not accepted after all.

Even though those pictures could not be used, we were making a strenuous effort during the photo shoot. In those days, the boutiques in Hong Kong weren’t used to lending their goods for photo shoots. The agent in Hong Kong tried hard to persuade them. Finally they reluctantly accepted the proposal on the condition that we would return all the clothes and shoes as good as new, and if there were to be any stains or damages, we would have to buy them at no discount.
We didn’t tell Leslie anything about the contract at first, so Leslie chose the clothes without considering the price. Each piece cost more than several thousand US dollars. The suit was so expensive that we wondered if the digits on the price tag were wrong!

This meant that we were not able to cut or sew up the hem of the pants. We managed to find a way to use paper adhesive tape to hem up the pants, but the tape didn’t stick, maybe because the material of the pants was too good. Though we were afraid that we might damage the texture, we had no choice except to use cloth adhesive tape. We used a small piece of the tape on a small section of the pants. We had already told Leslie about the contract and the price of the clothes, and asked him to treat them as carefully as possible. So a solemn Leslie took the pants with the cloth adhesive tape to the fitting room. He changed into the clothes and came out with exaggerated care. When we had taken all the photos, Leslie went slowly back to the fitting room. All of us heaved a sigh of relief when the photo shoot finished without a hitch. Then suddenly we heard a cry from the fitting room. “Come and help me!!” I sprang up from my seat. Leslie with a wretched expression on his face was unable to move and he was standing there still with those pants on. I looked at his feet and noticed that the bottom of the pants was strangely rolled up. When I touched the bottom of the pants, Leslie’s face twisted with pain and he cried, “Ouch!!” The adhesive tape had stuck to the hairs on his leg. On seeing that, I could not help letting out a suppressed laughter. Leslie glared at me but once I started laughing, it was difficult for me to stop. I still kept laughing while telling him, “Oh, it seems painful. Is it painful? It must hurt! How pitiful!!” Upon seeing my reaction, Leslie despite evidently in pain also started to laugh.
Both of them, Leslie and the pants, sticking and being stuck, were very expensive, so we had to be very careful when we tore off the tape. We finally managed it but the experience was upsetting.

During the photo shoot, there was a small conflict between Leslie and me. It was not a serious one, but somehow the episode was stuck in my mind and I cannot forget it. Though the photos were not in the book in the end, we had a plan to take some photos of Leslie drinking alcohol. I asked Leslie, who was making himself up in the waiting room, what kind of liquor he would like. Leslie thought for a while and said, “I’d like cognac!” He said it clearly. So I went to the restaurant in the club and came back with cognac. When I showed it to him, he gave me a bewildered look and asked, “What is it?” I answered, “Cognac!” I thought he was feigning ignorance. Then Leslie replied again with a wondering look, “Why?” “Because, you said, 'cognac'!” I was a bit offended by his words.

Leslie: “Me? Did I say such a thing?”

I: “Yes, you surely said so!”

Leslie: “I don’t think so.”

I: “Yes, you did!”

Leslie: “Well, you know, I don’t like cognac!”

I: “I don’t know whether you like cognac or not, but you certainly said cognac!”

Leslie: “But cognac is for old men. Don’t you know that?”

I: “……………”

He was impudent. Watching his face, I began to feel stupid about arguing. So I asked him, “Well, if you don’t like cognac, what would you like then?” Then Leslie replied with an innocent smile, as if there had been no conflict, “Well, let me see… maybe wine… Yes, I would like some wine!”
While writing this episode, I wonder why he said cognac once and then denied it firmly afterwards. I wonder if he insisted that he had never said such thing because he wanted to fool me, or maybe because he didn’t remember at all what he had said. If he really didn’t say it, I must have been daydreaming then. I don’t know which is true at all. It remains a mystery in my mind.

The Hopeless Hong Kong Movie World and the Ideal Country - Japan

On the last day of the three week tracking report, we celebrated it with a small party at the coffee shop in Peninsula Hotel. By that time, Leslie and I had become quite close friends. He was in a very happy mood because he was liberated from the hard schedule of the film shoot and interviews so we enjoyed our pleasant chatter till the midnight. As far as I can remember, at that time we made the plan that we would hold an autograph event when the book was published. Leslie was worried about the cost of the event that we would have to pay and he suggested that we wouldn’t have to pay his fee but just the expenses. I told Leslie that I wouldn’t trouble him coming all the way to Japan just for the few hours autograph event with no fee. But Leslie said to me, “Don’t worry. I am thinking about a trip to Japan, since spring is the best season to visit there. I will attend the event while I am touring Japan!”

The business talks with Leslie were always in such a way. I always discussed directly with Leslie about money, schedule and so on. In spite of his long career as a top star, he had a very good concept of economics. He had a strong principle that he was willing to spend money if necessary, but he would not waste money at all. Moreover this principle was applied to not only himself but also to the business counterparts. According to his principal, he would get the sales royalty from the books, as that was a business stipulation but as for the autograph event, it was not a business but a result of the discussion between friends. Leslie did not want us to incur unnecessary expense so we could save as much money as possible to make us breakeven.

Such kind consideration was one of his splendid characteristics. He tried to lighten the partner’s burden as much as possible depending on the partner’s situation. His decision was supported by his ability of quick calculation and his very good economic concept. However, seen from a different point of view, it might be said that his policy was “Get money from those who have a lot!” Actually I have heard some “not so good reputations” about the money sense of Leslie from the big companies’agents who had worked on business with Leslie. But I think Leslie knew it full well. Leslie seemed to think it was a very proper and reasonable maxim; “I won’t always say NO to doing what I don’t like to do, but I would want to be paid more if they insist that I do what I don’t want to do.” “I won’t demand too much from those who don’t have much money, but if they have a lot, I want to be well paid!”

I feel it is the typical maxim of Hong Kong people.

Friends and money are most important to them. Lacking either one, people would not be able to survive in Hong Kong. There is no correlation between the value of friendship and the quest for financial gains from the affluent.

Well get the story back to the main stream.

At first Leslie was supposed to sign 300 autographs. We thought the number was very appropriate. Leslie said he would sign his signature on the book while shaking hands and having a few words with the fans. (It is the typical autograph event in the book store when a new book is published) It would take 20~30 seconds per person. If he would work without any break, 300 people would be the maximum number to be able to deal within 2 hours. We took it for granted that we would be holding the event at the corner of a book store. Little did Leslie and I dream that this event would be such a big scale event which was later called “The unprecedented autograph event for the newly published book”.

We talked about a lot of things during this night, but I hardly remember them now. The only one I remembered clearly was his aspirations for the future.

When I asked him, “Is it your dream in the future to become a director?” Leslie replied like this:
Leslie: “I would like to direct some movies. When I consulted with some directors who were my friends, they all said, “You had better be an actor as long as possible!” But I am not so interested in acting any more. Those who make the movies are not actors but the directors! After all, an actor is only one of the chessmen on the board.

I: “I hope you will be a great director who will shoulder the future of Hong Kong’s movie world!”

Then he said to me with a slight gloomy face,

Leslie: “As for the Hong Kong movie world, the movie industry is in its twilight years. I don’t think it will recover its past glory. Even though we are making movies, the pirated edition would come out very quickly. The police are reluctant to control them for fear of confrontation with the Mafia. Though the quality of the sound and pictures are very poor, people in Hong Kong are contented with these pirated versions and wouldn’t come to the movie theatres any more. They don’t care much about the movies. That is why the situation of the cinema world in Hong Kong is deteriorating and we cannot make good movies. It is a vicious circle. They don’t notice they are standing in the way of their own promotion. Even if some of them realize it, they won’t do anything. I think the movie world in Hong Kong is going downhill gradually. So I don’t have much hope in Hong Kong.”

Then he continued,

Leslie: “I am thinking about moving abroad in about 5 years. Hong Kong is not the place to enjoy the rest of my life. I have failed when I had immigrated to Canada, so maybe England. I think I am not the type to live in the countryside.

So I asked him, “Why don’t you come to Japan?”, then Leslie said with the best smile I had ever seen, “Japan! Oh, I’d love to! My most favorite country in the world! Japan is my ideal country. I am sure I will get along well with Japanese!”

But after saying that, his face was clouded and continued, “But there is a big problem. The language barrier! I love Japan, but Japan is not easy for the Asian who cannot speak Japanese to live in. If I were a little bit younger, I would study Japanese hard, but it is too late for me now. If I could make myself understand in English in Japan, I would immigrate to Japan without any hesitation.”

I remembered that he had said that Japan was his ideal country several times. It was not just his vague image.

He had a reasonable ground for such thoughts. Firstly Japan is the safest country in the world and secondly it is the international big city where he can get anything he wants from all over the world. Thirdly there are many beautiful sceneries and nature is not so far from the city.
The final and the most important point was Leslie was not as famous in Japan as in Hong Kong but at the same time he was not so much an unknown that nobody knew about him. It meant that he could go anywhere freely without any fuss or being stared at, because most Japanese didn’t know him but yet he was popular enough to draw a full audience if he wanted to do something in Japan. It would be also possible for him to attend some cultural events as a guest in Japan.

I thought what he had said was quite reasonable. Japan might be an ideal country for him. Japan was able to fulfill his requirements in every respect except the language barrier and this was the ultimate drawback for him…

On our parting, Leslie held out his arms and embraced me tight with all his strength. Seen from the distance, he looked rather small and slender but when I was embraced by him with his whole body, I could feel his robust and muscular body. “Take care, and see you soon!!” Those were his words of farewell then.

1998 Late Autumn

His mother's death and the publication of the photo book

After the meeting of Leslie at the Conrad Hotel, my image of Leslie changed a lot. The image I had about him was a person who was such a stoic that he didn’t accept others easily. However I think it was just an unreasonable image which I made up from his roles or performances in his movies, such as “Days of Being Wild”, “Farewell My Concubine” and the emotional and critical articles by the reporters of the show business world in Hong Kong. Besides having contact with Leslie was much more difficult than we had expected. We also got the information that though there were some offers to make his photo book, he refused all of them. So I thought he must be a very difficult man.

As we were afraid, I got the same answer every time, everywhere; “Leslie? It will be impossible.” “Leslie doesn’t belong to anywhere and doesn’t have his office or manager. As for the movies or songs, you can go and ask at the music or movie companies. However the photo book is a very private request, so you have to contact Leslie directly, and it will be impossible.”
Gradually we began to think this plan would be impossible and decided to give up. It was the beginning of 1998.

A few months later, however, this plan was resumed. I told the plan of Leslie’s photo book to one of my friends, Y from Hong Kong. To my great surprise, one of Y`s friends from college is a close friend of Leslie. My friend’s friend was Leslie’s friend’s friend. For us Japanese, this relationship is almost nothing, but in Hong Kong it is different. People in Hong Kong consider the friendship much more important than Japanese. It is not too much to say that from daily lives to business, the most important thing is each other’s relationship. So if you betray your friend, it means you betray the Hong Kong society.

“Please don’t betray Leslie! I do trust you, but if you should betray him, I would lose all of my friends.” Y said half jokingly, but I guess she was quite serious.

Thanks for the introduction from his close friend, Leslie was happy to accept me as if we were a long term friend at the very first meeting. I have to say I was so lucky. When we began to talk about the photo book, I felt this was a destiny. I guess he had the same feeling.

Leslie lost his mother a few days before our meeting. When I heard this, I thought we should postpone our meeting. However he thought differently. He said, “I have been asked to make a photo book several times, but I didn’t feel like it. I didn’t feel anything which pushed me to go forward. Besides, I published a photo book once 10 years ago and I love the book very much. So I wonder if I could make this book better than that book.”

Leslie started speaking frankly and showed me the photo book, 'Stark Impressions' , which was made 10 years ago. It was the last copy he had with him. There were a lot of photos of a young and sprightly Leslie in the book, which made me a bit shy. The book was made not for self promotion but for expressing his thanks and farewell to all his fans from Leslie, who had decided to retire and immigrate to Canada.

“Ten years have passed and my mother passed away, then you asked me this project with my revered friend’s recommendation. So I feel this is some kind of fate.”

When this plan was made known to him from his friend, his mother was already on her deathbed. His mother’s death was, I think, the biggest event in his life. On the other hand it also meant the end of the days he had lived with the mixed feeling of joy and sorrow.

“The previous photo book was a commemoration of my farewell to myself as a pop idol. This one, I may say, will commemorate my new life, as my mother’s death made me free from a lot of complex feeling I had had.”

What he said surprised me.

While speaking about his mother, Leslie’s face was very calm and he seemed as if he had some spiritual awakening. At that time I didn’t know anything about the complex relationship between his mother and Leslie, so I was surprised at him when he talked about his mother’s death without deep emotion.

However, when I asked him about his mother in our interview for the book later, he showed me his overwhelmed feeling for his mother, because we became close to each other. While talking about his mother, he was sometimes moved to tears. After that, whenever she became the topic of our conversation, I could see that his thought to his mother was so deep and complicated that he became sometimes cool, sometimes hot, and sometimes resentful and above all, he loves his mother deeply. The especially touching part of his confession was when he became successful in his career and bought a nice apartment beside a beach. Then he finally made his dream come true and started living with his mother. However both of them felt uneasy and there was no conversation between them. So Leslie bought a present for her every day and took her to expensive restaurants, but she felt daunted by that and started to behave with an air of remoteness towards him.

After talking about that, Leslie said with a sigh, “I realized I could not buy love.”

When I heard his words, I was almost moved to tears. Where in this world can we find a child who tries to buy his mother’s love? I thought he would rather be loved by only his mother than to be loved by tens of thousands of fans, and I was moved with pity by his words.

Well we had better get back to the main subject.

At the first meeting of him, I observed him through our business talk. I could see he was also trying to see through what I am. I also wanted to know what he is as a long term business partner. Leslie was full of expressions. His features changed at a dizzying pace. He once was nasty like a small boy, or was playing a baby like a spoilt girl, then suddenly became very manly. But what impressed me a lot was not his outward appearance but his quick decision and his management ability. He was very smart, had a good memory and made the decision on the spot. During our work, there were a lot of things which required our decisions, but he had never said, “Let me think for a while” or “Give me some time” He always considered the matter and made the decision on the spot. However his prompt decision was not always a good thing. In fact he also changed his mind and plans without any previous notice, which surprised and confused us.
Anyway, my image of Leslie has totally changed since the first meeting. He was neither protective nor hard to be pleased but was a very friendly and cute person who loved having a chat and laughed very often.

On the other hand he also had a different facade.

Our first meeting took about 3 hours and I saw his unfriendly face only once. Our table was in the innermost part, which was not seen by the other guests. When our meeting was over and Leslie stood up to walk, two young girls, who noticed it was Leslie, came running towards him with a loud cry. I could not understand their words, but it seemed that they were screaming, “Give me your autograph!” Leslie hesitated for a second and stood there to wait for them. While standing, he was staring forward with surprisingly expressionless eyes. After signing his autographs without a word on the paper they handed in, Leslie left the shop quickly.

I have seen the same expression several times since the first meeting. His eyes were so peculiar and it could be said they were sorrowful rather than cold. They were out of focus; certainly looking at something but seemed as if they were not seeing anything, the sorrowful eyes were one of my unforgettable features of Leslie as well as the friendly smile. It can be said that it was the most 'Leslie-like' expression.

Leslie’s house and the people around him

The interview and photo shoot took 3 weeks. Leslie also had another project to make the movie “The Kid”, so we also went to the film set to report it as well as our own interview and photo shooting.

The biggest change of the plan was the new chapter, “Leslie on Holiday” At first he said, “I don’t want to disclose my private life to the public, so don’t take photos inside my house.” However after working together for several days, he changed his mind and offered to us,” Let’s take pictures in my house!”

His house was near Kowloon Station and was in an exclusive part of the city. The area is owned by a famous rich person in Hong Kong. The houses of Andy Lau and Tsui Hark are also in this area and Karen Mok lives in an apartment near his house.

When we visited his house for the first time, he together with his pt dog, Bong welcomed us. Then an unexpected incident happened. I still remember it very clearly.

Though I don’t dislike dogs, I have never had a pet dog and I wasn’t used to dealing with a dog. When Leslie introduced Bingo to me “This is my pet dog, his name is Bingo.” While patting his head, I also tried to reach out to him saying “Hello, Bingo!” carelessly. Suddenly Bingo started barking at me and bit my hand. He didn’t bite seriously, so my wrist only turned a little red. But Leslie took it very seriously and was terribly upset. He asked me” Are you OK? Oh, what should I do!? ”He asked me again and again while anxiously stroking my hand.

Then he scolded Bingo and beat his head several times. I felt very sorry for both Leslie and Bingo, so I tried to calm Leslie with saying “I am OK; I am not hurt at all!” However Leslie called a maid and had Bingo taken away. He never allowed Bingo to come into the room until midnight. I must admit that the encounter between Bingo and me was not a very happy one.

In Leslie’s house, two maids and a chauffeur were living with Leslie. The maids come from the Philippines, one of them was in her 50`s and the other was in her 30`s. It is very common for the affluent in Hong Kong to hire maids. Both of the maids in Leslie’s house were very diligent. I was always impressed by their good manners and care. However what surprised me most was Leslie’s attitude towards the maids. As they didn’t understand Cantonese, Leslie always spoke to them in English. His English was always very polite. To hear them speak, the conversation didn’t seem to be one between a master and his maids. Leslie’s English was the Queen’s English learned in England. His pronunciation was very beautiful and his usage of words was very refined. However in friendly pleasantries, he spoke in an intimate way using casual words. However when he speak to his maids, he always used “Gentleman’s English”.

I wanted to ask him the reason, but had no chance. I guess in order to show his maids how to speak nicely, Leslie, the master himself, tried to use the refined English, as he often invited a lot of important guests to his house.

The chauffeur was an elderly man. He was always in Leslie’s house washing cars (at that time Leslie had 2 cars, a Range Rover and a big Mercedes), taking care of Bingo or doing some carpentry work in the garage. I am not sure whether he was living in Leslie’s house or not. Maybe he just came to work every day.

Leslie used each car depending on the occasion. He seemed to make it a rule to drive the Rover when he drove himself and to use the Mercedes when being chauffeur driven. When we met at some restaurant or a hotel, he would drive his Rover to the meeting place. If he drank, he would call his chauffeur to come pick him up. I think the chauffeur also returned later to drive the Range Rover back home afterwards. Leslie gave me a ride several times. In spite of the reputation about his driving manner, he drove his car very safely. I said to him “I heard you drove a car roughly.”

“Ridiculous! I am a very good driver! My driving is a lot safer and more comfortable than a taxi!!” He answered half seriously and half jokingly.

There was one more young man who came to Leslie’s house to work every day. His name was Man Chai. He was around 20 years old at that time. He had been working for a film company as a part-time film making assistant. After the term of his contract ended, Leslie hired him as his private assistant. Though Mai Chai was a nice and cheerful boy, he was still very childish and didn’t possess good manners. Leslie was taking care of him all the time. Leslie was redressing every movement Mai Chai made. So I would tease him, “Both of you look like a father and a son!”, then Leslie laughed and replied jokingly, “Yes, to tell you the truth, he is my illegitimate son I had when I was 20!!”

Before hiring Man Chai, Leslie had had several assistants and he told me about them. He said, “As for the assistant, I think a female assistant is better. Actually my very first assistant was a woman. She was an extremely competent assistant and I liked her very much. However the mass media began fabricating a lot of rumors (fake stories) about us and it became impossible for me to keep her in my employ any more because she was a single woman. I have had enough!! So I decided to use a male assistant but then they started making up scandalous stories about us again. After all they want to write something about me regardless of the sex of my assistant! I gave up.” Leslie said scornfully with a wry smile.

Concerning about Man Chai, he was really not the target of the mass media gossips; instead he seemed to provide a very safe shield against the mass media gossips. But in my eyes, Man Chai was too unreliable as an assistant for Leslie, who was working in the international world of show business.

When I saw Leslie translating the menu one by one to Man Chai who couldn’t understand English, it made me wonder which of them the assistant was. Leslie might feel as if Man Chai were a younger brother or a son and wanted to teach him how to behave nicely.

Well let continue with the topic of Leslie’s residence.

Leslie was especially cautious and extremely sensitive about disclosing his privacy but it didn’t bother him one little bit to have pictures of his previous house being published. In Leslie’s words, “It is not my house any more so it does not matter at all” He was very fond of a moving house. After this interview about two years later, he moved to the house again, so I think Leslie would allow me to tell the details of the house in which he was living when we made this interview.
As I wrote before, the whole area was the property of a wealthy person and the all houses in that area belonged to him. So Leslie rented the house from the owner. The house had 3 stories and the layout of the house was a little bit complicated. Seen from the front door, the room which had the entrance door was the ground (First in American English) floor, but once you entered the house, went upstairs into the living room, you would find that the room faced the yard and that you were on the ground floor. It seemed that the height of the roads were on different level between the front and the back of the house. But I am not sure, as I didn’t see his house from the back road to confirm this. There were the entrance, a garage, and the rooms for housework on the ground floor.

On the first floor, there were a living room, a dining room for guests, a small private dining room for Leslie, a kitchen and a toilet. The main dining room was quite large, as big as about 130. It was a very cozy room with a uniform color scheme throughout and had floor ceiling glass windows facing the south. The big yard facing the south was surrounded by a high fence and trees. There was a small pond in the yard with several carps swimming in it. Leslie said that his elder brother, who was a feng Shui master, recommended him to keep them.

On the second floor, there were a private bed room, a bath room and a study for Leslie. The private pictures of Leslie’s awaking in “Leslie’s Holiday” were taken in these rooms. This photo shooting began in the early morning, so the pictures of Leslie brushing his teeth, shaving or eating break fast were quite similar to his real private life.

The series of pictures, which were named “Kitty Leslie!” and loved by Japanese fans, were also taken in his bedroom. Our first plan was just taking photos of Leslie’s awakening. We didn’t have any other plans but as the shooting went on, the friendly mood led Leslie to offer “Let’s take the photos in my bed!” Leslie went into his bed with only his underwear He began to make many poses with the quilt, which was so sexy and my heart began pounding fiercely.

During this photo shoot, there was one more memorable incident on that day which I cannot forget and it was Leslie displaying his culinary skills by cooking for us.

Accurately speaking, it was the maids who prepared the dishes with Leslie’s help and according to his instructions. That day the photo shooting began in the early morning. Leslie decided to invite us to have lunch in his house. He said, “I will cook a light lunch, so let’s have lunch together! It will just be ordinary dishes which I often make. Is it alright with you?” Then he went into the kitchen and began to cook lunch with the maids.

He came back into the living room every now and then while cooking, but he seemed to be concerned about the cooking and went back to the kitchen. After about one hour, Leslie and the maids cheerfully brought the dishes to the dining room. The menu was rice gruel with chicken and scallop, chow mien and some other dishes which regrettably I could not remember. To tell you the truth, the rice gruel was so delicious that I asked for another helping sometimes, which made me too full to have other dishes.

When I said to Leslie, “This is the tastiest rice gruel I have ever had!” Leslie was very pleased and he personally refilled my bowl immediately each time he noticed my bowl had become empty.

I am not a food gourmet, so I am not confident in my own sense of taste for the gruel. But the hair artists and the make-up artists from Hong Kong as well as the camera man, Mr.Shimuzu, all asked for a second helping and they were full of the highest praises for the gruel so I think the dish was really delicious! The praises made Leslie happy and he talked a lot about cooking while eating.

Leslie went to England to study when he was very young, so he had a lot of experiences in cooking. He said, “I can cook almost all dishes and the rice gruel is one of my prides! When I hired the maid, I taught them this recipe from scratch firsthand. However I am still worried about leaving everything in their hands. I am more relieved if I do the last seasoning by myself!” Leslie said happily.

I have had rice gruels many times since then, but still the Leslie’s rice gruel is the number one for me!

An unexpected intruder and Leslie in a blue mood

Several days later when we visited his house again, Leslie had a stern face. He was opening and closing the windows and he was also checking all locks in his house with Man Chai. I asked him the reason for doing this and he answered that a woman fan had sneaked into Leslie’s bedroom the previous day. There were some big trees in the back yard which faced the living room. One of them was very big and some big branches from the huge trunk almost reached to Leslie’s bed room. The girl seemed to have climbed the fence from the back road and then she had climb up the branches, opened the window and had sneaked into the bedroom without being noticed by the maids.

Leslie came home at night from work. After relaxing in the living room for a while, he went up to his bedroom. The bedroom was in complete darkness and there seemed to be nothing wrong but when Leslie turned on the light, he caught sight of a girl’s eyes. She was crouching at the corner of his bed. She seemed not to have any knife or such kinds of weapons, but she was fixated on something with an obsessed look in her eyes. From past experiences, Leslie knew it was no good to raise an alarm. So he started to talk to her calmly. As he had expected, she with her bloodshot eyes began to cry out, “You are a liar! You promised me we would get married!!” After shouting for a while, she began to weep. Leslie listened to her rattling on in silence. When the girl became calm down a bit, Leslie persuaded her not to do like this any more and let her go back home.
I asked Leslie, “Do these incidents occur frequently?” He answered, “Yes, occasionally. Last night’s case was not so dangerous, but during the days when I was an idol, there were such incidents in which I felt that there were possibilities I could have been killed on several occasions.” And he shrugged his shoulders.

The devoted fans are very important for the idols because the support of the fans sustain their popularity. However these overzealous fans are sometimes scary. For someone like Leslie who had maintained his states as a superstar for 20 years, the behaviors and actions of the different type of fans were nothing new to him. Although at times these experiences could be dangerous and life-threatening, he also knew it was these fans that had made him what he was. I felt that he had a complicated feeling for his fans as well as for his mother. On that day, I had an interview with Leslie in his house for half a day. Leslie was slow in his speech. This could be due to the incident of the previous night still weighing heavily on his mind or because it was too hard for him to tell me about his memories of his childhood. Especially when we talked about his parents, Leslie became silent for a period of time as if he were self-examining his thoughts on what he should tell me about his parents.

“What are the happy memories when you were a small child?” I asked him. Then he replied coldly, “I have no happy memories at all!” I tried to say something, but words failed me. How many people are there in the world who can declare that he or she had no happy memories in his or her childhood? I sensed the memories of his childhood were not pleasant. He seemed to be depressed on this day and his comments tended to be very negative and pessimistic. So I started to worry that the chapter on this interview would be a very gloomy and dreary one.

That day we finished the interview well ahead of time. What Leslie said at the end of the interview was so sad that it was painful to listen to his words. He said “I sometimes think I cannot love anyone. Considering my life, perhaps I might not have loved anyone seriously. I thought I loved the person at that time, but once I became calm, I felt I was alone.” I asked him “How about now? Don’t you have anyone whom you love? Are you still feeling lonely?” He answered, “No, I don’t have anyone. I have always been lonely, even now.”

Obviously Leslie was feeling very low on that day.

The tracking report of the movie “The Kid” was proceeding smoothly synchronizing very well to the movie shooting schedule. On the first day of the report, we witnessed a very heart warming scene while we were waiting him in a small park in Square Street. Two boys of ages around 5 or 6 years were playing on a swing when they sighted Leslie. They immediately dashed towards him when director Jacob Cheung and Leslie were walking past the swing discussing the script and making various arrangements. The two boys frantically dug into their back pockets of their shorts but they could not find anything appropriate. They looked at each other rather awkwardly. Right at this moment Leslie had pulled out some tissue papers from his pocket and unfolded two pieces of the papers neatly. He burrowed a pen from the director and autographed his name on the papers on the stone carefully, then handed them to the two boys. They ran away happily waving the papers.

The people in Hong Kong are very fond of getting autographs of stars. Of course there is also the same kind of people in Japan, but to my eyes, they seem to be crazy to get the autographs. Because of this, we sometimes became victims when we were with Leslie. It seems that they are oblivious to everything in the surrounding except the star when they spot their idol. One of our female staff literally had been taught a “painful lesson”. One day we went to Discovery Bay during the tracking report and we went into Mc Donald’s restaurant. Leslie and I were seated near the wall at the corner of the shop and the staff was sitting opposite us. The fans, who didn’t expect to see Leslie eating a hamburger in such a place, discovered Leslie with their sharp eyes and let out a loud exclamation. Then the whole shop was in an uproar. The girls began to rush towards us with pieces of papers and pencils. In a second, the female staff was thrust by the elbows, pocked in the ribs and pinned down on her head. She gave a cry of pain. On seeing this, Leslie’s face grew pale with fury and he shouted something sharply to the fans. Then other staffs members who were seated near the door came over in a hurry and got rid of them saying “Well, well, go away!” I still don’t know exactly what Leslie had yelled out earlier. However I remember his face was so fierce that the people around him were frightened to come near because of his menacing expression.

A Conflict of Opinions over Leslie’s Beard

As you have already been aware that the photos in the first half of the book “All about Leslie” were Leslie with a beard and those in the latter half was Leslie without his stubble. There is a long story behind this and I cannot avoid not explaining this episode when I write the inside stories of this photo book.

When I first met Leslie, he had a beard because of the film shoot of “The Kid”. He had intended to play the role with his beard all through this movie. When you see the finished film, you would notice that Leslie had a beard after losing his job. So you might have thought, “Well, after losing his job, Wing became indifferent to his appearance and that’s why he had unshaven look.” But originally Wing was supposed to have a beard when he was working as an elite stockbroker. Actually before our interview, some scenes or pictures of that part had already been shot. Leslie himself was fond of his beard and he demanded that all pictures in this photo book should be taken with a beard. But I wanted to take pictures of Leslie without a beard, with that smooth skin by all means. Of course Leslie with his stubbly look was not bad, but many of his fans would not be happy if the all the pictures in this book were Leslie with a beard. So I decided to insist on behalf of many Leslie fans that some pictures should be taken without a beard. However Leslie was not easily persuaded. He was unexpectedly stubborn and persisted in having a beard. I thought I could persuade him but Leslie was hard to be persuaded. So I insisted on my opinion again and again. But every time I asked him closely “Why?” Leslie evaded the point and said “Because it is cool!” “Because I like it!”, “It looks sexy!” or “Because it looks manly!” As for me, it was true that I also didn’t have much persuasive power. If he had asked me “Why not?” I would have answered in a similar fashion just like Leslie did. “Many fans may prefer you without a beard”, “I love that.”, or “It looks nicer!” So the battle with his beard continued.

Every time I saw him, I kept saying “I think you look nicer without a beard!” and Leslie also kept insisting on the merit of the beard saying “Why? It is cool! I look sexy, don’t you think so?” Leslie might have thought that he looked soft and childish without his stubble Leslie hadn’t aged in these ten years as he looked very young for his age. Perhaps he might have wanted to make a clear difference between this book and the one he had made 10 years before and to create some manly sex appeal in this book. That was why he had been trying to persuade me, who wouldn’t say yes to him, to agree with him. While both of us didn’t give way to each other, our interview period had passed its halfway mark. As we were fed up with the argument about his beard, the topic seldom came up in our conversation. I still wanted to convince him, but it would be impossible for him shave his beard during the film shooting of “The Kid” So I thought I would talk about it with him after filming has finished.

One day, when we were discussing the place where the second interview would be held, Leslie asked me whether he could call on my room in the hotel. I was staying a twin room in Grand Hyatt in Hong Kong Island with my female staff. I told him that our room was not big enough to have guests but then he said, “A small room will be better, as I can relax. And also I would like to see the room of the Grand Hyatt. If you don’t mind, I would like to visit your room!”

For the entertainers in Hong Kong, hotel rooms are a kind of like their living rooms. Usually they have meetings at the coffee shop in a Hotel, but they often use hotel rooms when they need some privacy or concentration. As Grand Hyatt had just opened for business, Leslie seemed interested to check out the rooms in this hotel.

I said OK to him and Leslie visited my room the next evening. The day became “the day to remember” for our photo book!

On that day we made an appointment to meet at the hotel lobby at 5:00 pm in the afternoon but somehow I misunderstood about the time and had come down to the lobby 30 minutes earlier. Wondering if I should go back to my room, I casually looked up at the center staircase. There is a magnificent spiral staircase in the center of Grand Hyatt’s lobby. It is a large and magnificent staircase similar to the one in the mansion in Tara in the movie “Gone with the Wind”. In my memories, there was a red carpet on it at that time. Standing in the middle of the staircase, Leslie was smiling at me a bit embarrassingly. Man Chai was standing at a short distant from Leslie. “Oh!” I ran towards the stairs expressing my doubt. Though he had never been late for an appointment, but he had also never come earlier. When I went up stairs towards him, he questioned me with a sulky look on his face, “Why did you come down earlier?” I replied “That is what I would like to ask you too! Why did you turn up so early?”

“I wanted to surprise you but you have found me!” he said with a comic look on his face. Then he went up the stairs saying “Well, wait here for a while. I have something which will surprise you!” Man Chai turned around and showed me the ‘V‘ sign and smiled. I was standing there feeling quite puzzled.

Leslie came back in less than 10 minutes. He smiled at me a bit embarrassingly like a mischievous child who had played a trick. To my great surprise, his beard had disappeared!
Man Chai pulled out an electric shaver and pointed at it with other hand. I asked him, “Oh my! Did you shave your beard in the washroom over there?” Leslie answered “Yes, sorry. I had decided to shave my beard off while on my way here, but I wanted to do it a little bit dramatically!” He also assured me as he knew I was worrying about the film shooting. “The entire scene on `Wing after losing the job` finished today. We are going to film the scene of Wing working as a stockbroker from now on. I asked the director to film this part without a beard. The part we have already finished can be filmed over again so don’t worry!” How wonderful it was! I was deeply moved by his wonderful planning and production. I also reflected upon myself and felt sorry for Leslie as I had been saying behind his back “How stubborn!” or “What an obstinate person he is!”

The second interview - we enjoyed off the record talks

On this day our interview was totally different from the previous interview. Our discussions started from the touching events which I had written in the previous chapter and this time our interview was conducted in a harmonious atmosphere. Leslie was also very courteous, maybe because the interview was held in a lady’s room. When Man Chai tried to sit on the bed, he told Man Chai not to sit on the bed of other people. (I guessed he said so, as he spoke in Chinese, which I couldn’t understand!), and ordered him to sit on the sofa.

As we had to jot down notes and record on tape what he said during the interview, we decided to converse over the small wooden table which was set in the room. The table was very small so we sat extremely close to each other and I felt as if we were playing a game of endurance to see who could out-stare each other. We had already finished with the topics on his childhood, his family, his studies in England and his debut as a singer, so we started this day’s interview focusing on the topic of his days as a pop idol. Before starting the interview, Leslie asked me, “I want to amend a little bit about my statement I gave you at the previous interview.” Just as I had expected, it was about his last statement, “I have never loved anyone!” He said, “I went too far, I think.” and he went on to explain, “It might come from my selfishness, which means that I am always not content with the present situation and tend to seek something better and more acceptable.” And he continued, “Now I reflect on my present situation, I think it is quite satisfying. I have a lot of good friends and I am able to love others. My problem is that when the other people can get 100% satisfaction, I can only get 76%. I don’t know why, but that is what I am.”

Of course I don’t know whether his troublesome nature was stemmed from his pessimism because of his unhappy childhood or from his arrogance because of having been spoilt too much as a superstar or from something completely different. What I can only say is that it seemed that he regarded such a nature as a problem by himself and yet he didn’t know what to do with himself.

Now I am listening to this tape after such a long time from the interview. His beloved voice caught my ear just at the beginning of the tape and I was moved to tears.
On that day he laughed a lot. I thought we had a kind of serious conversation, but I when I listened to the tape again this time, I found he had been laughing all the time throughout the interview. Besides the main topics, there were a lot of off record talks and I could hear the sound of his laughter intermittently.

Episode 1 - Talking about the title of this book

Leslie: “If you were to give me a catch phrase, what would it be?”

Me: “Well, let me see... (thinking for a while) Maybe, it would be “Oishisou na Otoko” in Japanese...?”

Leslie: “Oisou na Otoko? What does it mean?”

Me: “It means … (I explained in English)”

(Keiko's note - the meaning is a man who seems very delicious. In Japanese we use the word Oishii which means delicious not only for food but also for sex charm.)

Leslie: (My explanation made him laugh a lot) “Ha ha, you mean I will be eaten?”

Me: “It is a bit different…, but I think this is a nice phrase, don’t you think so? How do you think about this title, “Oishisou na Otoko, Leslie Cheung”?”

Leslie: (Still laughing) “It sounds interesting, but people might think the book is something strange…?”

Me: “Well, you could be right. People might think it is a kind of ambiguous book!!”

Leslie: “Ha ha….. ” (Just keep laughing)

Episode 2 - Talking about homosexuality a little bit further

Me: “Is the question on homosexuality a taboo subject?”

Leslie: “No, it isn’t taboo and actually I am not gay!”

Me: ……..???

Leslie: “I mean it doesn’t matter to me whether the person is of the same sex or the opposite sex. I am OK with either of them .What can I say, I mean, the scope of my acceptance is broad. If I come to like the person, the person’s sex doesn’t matter at all. Why do I have to choose between sexes? We should accept the broad cosmos of the universality of love!!”

Me: “Ummm. Cosmos…” (Being silent for a while)

Leslie: “Well it is very difficult to make people understood what I really want to say. But I don’t think I am gay. Do all Japanese fans think that I am gay?”

Me: “I don’t think it would be all of them, but there are many of those who think so.”

Leslie: “What can I say, well Japanese fans are too accomodating, may be! (Laughing) Some of these fans seem to be convinced that I am gay by their own judgment. At every event there would be some who would give me a big bag full of the books on homosexuality! I wonder what they were thinking about.” (Laughing)

Me: “Are those Japanese books related to homosexuality?”

Leslie: “Oh, yes! In addition those books were all very indecent (Laugh). Such kind of books published in Japan were excessive. They made me blush when I just flip open some pages. When I imagine the scene of a beautiful young girl buying these books just to please me, I feel embarrassed and also a bit uncanny.” (Laughing very hard)

Me: “Perhaps this is also a kind of deep love for you.”

Leslie: “They misunderstood me. I think they are obsessed by their own imagination!” (Laughing)

Episode 3 - Related to the topic of “Homosexuality”- An article about Leslie in some movie pamphlet written by a gay writer

Me: “From the homosexual point of view, it seems that you are also an attraction for gay people.”

Leslie: “I am pleased to be liked by anybody, but please don’t indulge in wild fantasies!” (Laughing)

Me: “It was a very serious essay on stars. He said you had a 'plus minus zero' charm, which means you are neither too much nor too little.”

Leslie: “Was he referring to my physique?”

Me: “What? I don’t think merely your physique only but he meant it in every aspect.”

Leslie: “No, I think he must be referring to my figure! No more and no less means that I am big bellied and have a body with no waist or curves, doesn’t it?”

Me: “Ha ha!!”

Leslie: “It is not a laughing matter! I have been taking quite good care. If you should meet the writer, please tell him that I don’t have a big belly!!” (Laughing)

The pleasant and funny off record talks, which I had totally forgotten, continued to play on and on in the tape. His laughter was so innocent! It reminds me of him and I am overwhelmed with grief. Leslie was very cheerful, open and honest in that meeting.

He drank some room service coffee plus 2 bottles of mineral water in the refrigerator. He opened a box of chocolate which was in the room asking if he could have it. There were 12 pieces of chocolates in the box. At first he made his selection carefully saying, “I like this, well I don’t like this.” But in the end he had eaten all of them by himself. Before we were aware of it, Man Chai had already fallen soundly asleep on the bed. Gazing at his sleeping posture, Leslie smiled bitterly with love as if he wanted to say, “I honestly don’t know what to do with you!”

A Preface

“Have you had your meal?”

Whenever we met, Leslie asked me like that. Though I know it is a set phrase for Hong Kong people, the phrase, which Leslie would use, still makes my heart full of emotion. I could say the phrase gives me the actual feeling for me that Leslie was certainly living in this world in those days.

The early autumn in 1998, I met Leslie for the first time. He came to the coffee shop in Hotel Conrad, which is one of the exclusive hotels in Hong Kong Island, at the appointed time. I cannot forget his eyes when we met each other.

He said, “Nice to meet you!” extending his hand out for a handshake, while his eyes were staring at me without blinking. I felt the eyes were very cold and sharp, as if he were tying to see through me and check who I am. Then suddenly a calm and carefree smile appeared on his face and asked me “Have you had your meal?” It was after seven in the evening and I had already had an early supper with my staff. When I said so, he looked at me with a bit of disappointed expression. Then he said “I am starved! May I have supper?” He called a waiter and ordered a chicken curry. He asked me a lot of questions one after another, such as “When did you come to Hong Kong? Yesterday? The day before yesterday?” “Which airline did you use?” Was the flight OK?” “Which hotel are you staying?”” Did you sleep well last night?”” How many times have you come to Hong Kong?”” Did you go up to the Peak?” and so on. So I answered those questions.

When the chicken curry was served, his eyes lit up and he started eating happily. In spite of his gentle feature, he ate the dish in a very manly manner and it made me smile.

Whenever I think of Leslie, what come to my mind first are the restaurants where we went and the dishes we ate. When he was eating delicious dishes, he looked happy and talked a lot.

Sometimes his English was too fast for me to follow. Regardless of my irresponsible answers, he kept speaking like a machine-gun! Even if I could not understand what he said, I was happy to see his attractive expression and gestures which represented his feeling very well.

I couldn’t imagine that Leslie, such a beloved character who is born to be loved by everybody, had such a deep darkness inside, which led him to end his life by himself.

I knew about his death during my journey. When I heard it, I could not believe it or I didn’t want to believe it. I thought this must be a bad dream.

However as the time goes by, now I am beginning to think that it was one of the possible way Leslie ended his life. And again my heart was filled with the helpless sadness that he has left all of us in that way.

Though he was already in his forties when I first met him, he looked so young and lively that he looked as if he were in his twenties and stayed a forever youth who left the aging somewhere. Whenever I met him, I could not imagine the figure of his senior age. I would think ”I wonder if the day will really come when this young man appear as an old man in front of us.” I felt somehow that the aging, which comes to everybody, couldn’t catch Leslie. It was very strange feeling. Now my feeling came true and Leslie has disappeared in front of us and will remain in our minds as a forever youth.

As if he were a wounded wild animal, he was gone alone by himself. Now nobody can see forever what kind of agony he had had under his lovable smile.

I might say it is just like him to put a period to his life in such a way.

Generally, Leslie was open and honest and his gentle smile made the people around him cheer up. He was a born star who was always outstanding and shining. On the other hand he tended to be misunderstood because of his complete honesty, which made him too vulnerable to survive the show business world where so many evil spirits are living. He was very delicate and sensitive. He also couldn’t leave things to others and wanted to do everything by himself. So when things didn’t turn out to be what he wishes, he was so irritated that his tense atmosphere kept others on their toes. He seemed to be irritated by himself because he could not be content with the situation with which ordinary person would be content with or because he couldn’t know how to handle his feeling. At that time Leslie looked so lonely and nihilistic that no one dares to approach him, which was very hard for me to see. How many times have I thought, “If he were more impudent and insensitive, Leslie would feel easier!”

Anyway such a nature made him Leslie. And he had an atmosphere which gave us a vague unrest for his future.

Well I talked too much unnecessary things. I am not going to look for the cause of his death. I don’t think I can do such a thing at all. Leslie and I are not very close friends. We worked together to publish 2 of his photo books. So we met several times both in Hong Kong and in Tokyo, exchanged mails and gradually we came to confide in each other on our private things. That is all. The distance between Hong Kong and Tokyo was just our mental distance, I think. So I have been thinking for a long time whether I might be a right person to write about him or not. There are many people who know Leslie much more than I in Hong Kong and Japan. My image of Leslie might be very partial or wrong. If those who know him very well should read my book, he (or she) would think this is nonsense!

Meanwhile I got a lot of letters from Leslie fans who asked me to write a book about Leslie’s memories. Then I began to think I might be an appropriate person. I know something about him but not too much. If the person was very close to Leslie, such as family or co- workers, it would be very difficult to write a book about him. As a person above acquaintance and below a close friend, I could be the one who can write about Leslie Cheung.

Once I hit on this idea, a lot of memories came back to me, his features and his words. I was surprised that my heart was filled with so many of his memories. And I realized that I had a lot of things to tell. There are too many things to write. However I will try to describe the fact, what I saw, the situation, what he said or did through the observer’s eyes without my feeling as much as possible. Therefore this book will be what Leslie was, the true Leslie through my eyes.
In order to respect his words, “I don’t care whatever they write about me, but I definitely want to protect my family and friends!” I carefully avoid the topics which might bother his family or friends.

There is one more thing I should make an excuse. I had never thought I would write a book about Leslie, so as for the dates, the places or details, I totally depend on my memories. There might be some mistakes.

I began to write this book in the middle of September. Time flies, and it is 6 months since Leslie passed away. I had tried to avoid thinking about him for 6 months. Though I thought I could manage my feelings I could not help shedding tears on the first few lines and the tears never stopped while writing. I wonder when I can finish this book, but I will try to do my best with the precious memories. I believe that Leslie in my heart will always help me!
The author, Chitose Shima

THE TIME OF LESLIE

THE TIME OF LESLIE
A book written by Chitose Shima




by Sangyo Henshu Center
Original English Translation For Overseas Fans
by Keiko
many thanks to Sim

To dedicate this Blog to our dearest Leslie Cheung

April 22, 2008